im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
