1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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