you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize