when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
