it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
His nipple licking is glorious
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