Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
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