fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
he had hair everywhere except his balls
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
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