My nipple is on Facebook.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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