SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
