i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize