Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
