You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
