yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
