Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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