I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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