you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
