On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
