Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
