no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
