Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
