dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize
