Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
