I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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