...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
