i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
