Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
It was confusing and full of hummus
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i would one night stand the shit outta him
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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