he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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