it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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