if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
