And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
