when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
