Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
you would pick up someone in the library
i will never coherently bang her
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize