i think my tv is drunk
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
