I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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