there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
