The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
