i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Randomize
