My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
