Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Randomize
