Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Say something about gay babies.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
