My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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