I'd wear matching sweaters with you
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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