Are we in a gay sports bar?
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
