so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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