i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize