Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
