I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize