Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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