I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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