Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
