I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
